“Mom, did you know there’s a kid on the bus who can fart his ABC’s? I think
he might just be the luckiest kid in the whole world.” Will-10
I, for one, would be thrilled as a parent to have this little tidbit to brag about. Imagine the conversation between parents at the bus stop…
“Yes, ladies, it’s true that little Johnny’s grades are in the toilet, but he has other gifts his father and I are encouraging at the moment. I really hate to brag, but the child has perfected the art of farting the entire alphabet both forwards and backwards. It’s really quite remarkable. In fact, we received a call from Cedars-Sinai Medical Center yesterday, inviting little Johnny to demonstrate his gift to patients who have lost the ability to communicate through speech. It’s true… Johnny will be enhancing lives by teaching others to communicate through their assholes.”
Should be good news for the bean industry.
Maybe we should invest in bean futures.
I’m sure your Will is a very special little person, but I know many people in the business world who communicate through their assholes so, perhaps, this is not such a unique talent? But just think, he could one day become a politician!
this made me laugh
Doc, I think I know many of those people you are referring to.
Best Farside cartoon EVER.
Will is going places, for certain.
The guy’s a genius! I don’t know if I could pick a favorite, but you’ve inspired me to try.
As for Will, I’m hoping that fart tricks will not be so awe-inspiring as he matures. Ah, who the hell am I kidding? Fart tricks are always awe-inspiring for most of the male population.
LMAO!!! OMG, could you imagine!? I want to see a YouTube video first!
I bet you’d get a million hits with that YouTube video.
ahh! Love it and that Far Side!
I love the Far Side, too. He’s a genius!
Thank you SO much for that old Far Side! He was one of my faves and that one (along with the boy dog courting a female dog) are a couple I still remember!
“Lost the ability for speech.” Oh!
You are so welcome! It’s one of my favorites, too. I’m half wondering if I’m allowed to put that up there on my blog. I pulled it up off of Photobucket.
Ohhh, the things we envy. Develop a unqiue talent so you can be invited to parties. The grosser the better. Ha!
Isn’t that the truth…
“Mom, make sure you invite little Johnny to my birthday party. He always has the best farts.”
Each person has been given a unique gift in life. This kid’s is that he can clear rooms. He could work riot control.
He could be the police department’s new secret weapon.
I can see being able to fart the ABC’s forwards… but backwards? That’s a little farfetched.
I also thought it was a little farfetched until I heard that both the kid’s parents are fartlingual.
“who have lost the ability to communicate through speech.”
Who have also lost the ability to smell
They’ll have to carry around a clothespin in their back pocket and learn to breathe through their mouth.
You need to show this to Mark over at “The Idiot Speaketh”, since he seems to be having some problems with, shall we say, excess gaseous outputs.
Why do I have mental images of a person studying an old Morse code manual with a gas mask on?
I love that image. Wouldn’t it make a perfect SNL skit?
Poor Mark. Do you have any old gas masks you can send him, or better yet, his family?
I knew the tests we use for identifying gifted students were missing something. I’ll recommend this one to the committee.
Please report back. I can’t wait to hear what they say.
i hope he is as gifted as you are Nancy. continue…
Thanks, Tony! I’ve got a knack for nonsense.
He could get a job on Jackass
Jackass! Can you imagine?
Upon returning home from a quick trip to the grocery store, I discover the inside of my house has been turned into a skate park and there’s a midget, dressed as a clown, preparing to dive off of my roof into a baby pool filled with piranha, while Will and Jay run around the backyard naked wearing cowboy hats and shooting each other with BB guns. Good times!
Ha Ha Ha I’m currently having trouble getting air in my lungs at the moment, GASP!!!. I s’pose this will make farting more socially acceptable. Farting in a restaurant can be excused as asking someone to pass the salt.
Restaurants will be forced to advertise whether or not they are “fartlingual.”
*squeek squeek squeeeeeek*
-translation-
Gary Larson = Genius
I agree, Sig. A pure genius!