Monthly Archives: June 2011

I’ll Be The Good Guy And You Be The Bad Guy

“Where are my Bobby pins?  Who took my Bobby pins? Why would someone take my Bobby pins?” Advertisements

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

It’s Not My Fault…I swear

“Mom, just so you know…I didn’t do it. There was a cup of juice, that wasn’t mine, that accidentally spilled on the coffee table, but it wasn’t my fault. I just found it there, all by itself with spillage everywhere. … Continue reading

Posted in comedy, funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

He Begs, Borrows and Steals…only sometimes

“Mom, Jay snuck into my room and stole all the gum out of my gumball machine.” Will-10 “No, I didn’t! I only stole some of it.” Jay-8 “Jay, you stole 98% of it. You left me with 2 pieces.” Will-10 “Will, … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 35 Comments

Brothers Don’t Let Brothers Eat Embarrassing Lunches

“Will, you can NOT let Mom put your sandwich in THAT container for lunch?” Jay-8 “Why not? I can’t eat a squished sandwich.” Will-10 “Why?!? Because it says, ‘Lunch-Munch, Yum-Yum’ and there are happy animals dancing on the lid. You … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 36 Comments

Feed Me Lobster

“Mom, why the heck is lobster so expensive? Do you think those lobster guys get a lot of money fishing for lobsters? Cause if they do, I might wanna be a lobster guy. I bet they make like a million … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 28 Comments

You Wish Your Porsche Was My Lamborghini

“Jay, the most expensive Lamborghini is more expensive than the most expensive Ferrari, which is more expensive than the most expensive Porsche…it’s true.” Will-10 “Will, I would definitely rather have the most expensive Lamborghini than the most expensive Ferrari.” Jay-8 … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

Breakfast of Champions

“Mom, there’s a piece of pepperoni in my cereal.” Jay-8 “Jay, you’re eating Cheerios. How would a piece of pepperoni end up in your bowl?” “Oh! Nevermind. It’s just my gum.” Jay-8 Yes, I know. Where did he get the … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Your Favorite Song Is Stupid!

“Anna, this is your favorite song.” Jay-8 “No, it’s not.” Anna-11 “Yes, it is. It’s totally your favorite song.” Jay-8 “Jay! This is NOT my favorite song. I don’t even like this song.” Anna-11 “Yes, it is. Will, isn’t this … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 41 Comments

Non-Stop To China

“Mom, I think it would be really cool to go to China someday. I hear the plane ride is really long, but Will told me that they give out free massages on the plane.” Jay-8 “Hey Will, did you tell … Continue reading

Posted in comedy, funny kid quotes, Humor, Life, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

The Redcoats Are Coming!

“Mom, I’m sorta glad I don’t live in England. I think I’d probably feel badly about losing the Revolutionary War. Do you think the British are embarrassed?” Will-10 He’s a very empathetic child.

Posted in crazy kids, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

A Gift To Remember

“Hey guys! What should we get Daddy for Father’s Day?” “How about a Lamborghini?” Jay-8 “Until your rap career is up and running, that’s a bit out of our price range.” “How about a used Lamborghini?”  Jay-8 “Still out of … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 30 Comments

Dummies of the Year!

I feel like I’ve won the lottery! Mel over at Dummies of the Year has honored me with his Top Commenter of the week award. Please head over to dummiesoftheyear.com  to check him out.  You’ll be glad you did!

Posted in Blogging, Plight | Tagged , , , | 21 Comments

Don’t Hate Me Because I Drive A Lamborghini, Hate Me Because You Still Drive A Minivan

“Mom, when I become a professional baseball player like Ryan Howard, I’m going to buy everyone in our family a Lamborghini. Won’t that be great?”    Jay -8 It looks like I’m going to have a baseball playing, Lamborghini driving, ninja … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

I Dream Of Shaq

“Mom, my new goal is to play in the NBA with Shaq.  I’ve been practicing.  I think they’ll take me.”  Jay-8 “Jay, you can’t play against Shaq.  He’s retired.”  Will-10 “What!?!  He’s retired!?!  Why!?!”  Jay-8    “Jay, Shaq’s old.  He’s turning … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments

Those Rich Dudes

“Mom, who made more money, the dude that invented the popsicle or the guy who invented electricity…what was his name again?” Jay-8 The dude that invented the popsicle owes his fame and fortune to the guy who discovered electricity. Without … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 26 Comments

The Samsung Lame

“Mom, do you have any idea how embarrassing my life is? Don’t you know that in 5th & 6th grade kids are identified by their cell phones? And I’m stuck with Daddy’s stupid old flip phone. I’ve got a Samsung Lame…that means I’m … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 32 Comments

An Embarrassing Lunch

“Mom, can you pack me lunch today? And please…don’t make it embarrassing.” Anna-11 As parents, there are many ways we can ruin our children’s lives. The possibilities are endless. An embarrassing lunch, however, seems to have been overlooked and hasn’t been … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 28 Comments

Shocking Realization

“Mom, did you know that I’m actually closer to being 20 then you are? And, by a lot.”  Anna-11    What?!? How the hell did this happen? I was 20 just last week…right? This must be some sort of cruel joke. Am I being … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 28 Comments

Mom, What Do You Think Would Happen If I Accidentally On Purpose Did Something Completely Stupid? And now I’m afraid I might die!

“Mom, I’m just wondering about something. What do you think would happen if I accidentally ate an entire bag of Skittles before breakfast? Do you think it would help me on my math test today?” Will-10 There have been an … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

There’s A Rapper In My House

“Mom, do rappers get paid because I’ve been working on a rap song. Check this out… Boom chicka bam bam, looking through a rubber band. Boom chicka bam bam, looking through underwear. Boom chicka bam bam, I think it’s time to eat a … Continue reading

Posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 43 Comments