My Child’s Gifted…eat your heart out!

“Mom, did you know there’s a kid on the bus who can fart his ABC’s? I think he might just be the luckiest kid in the whole world.”  Will-10

I, for one, would be thrilled as a parent to have this little tidbit to brag about. Imagine the conversation between parents at the bus stop…

“Yes, ladies, it’s true that little Johnny’s grades are in the toilet, but he has other gifts his father and I are encouraging at the moment. I really hate to brag, but the child has perfected the art of farting the entire alphabet both forwards and backwards. It’s really quite remarkable. In fact, we received a call from Cedars-Sinai Medical Center yesterday, inviting little Johnny to demonstrate his gift to patients who have lost the ability to communicate through speech. It’s true… Johnny will be enhancing lives by teaching others to communicate through their assholes.”  

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A mother's plight to find the funny in the frustrating and save her sanity.
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33 Responses to My Child’s Gifted…eat your heart out!

  1. Dad says:

    Should be good news for the bean industry.

    Like

  2. Doc says:

    I’m sure your Will is a very special little person, but I know many people in the business world who communicate through their assholes so, perhaps, this is not such a unique talent? But just think, he could one day become a politician!

    Like

  3. Lenore Diane says:

    Best Farside cartoon EVER.
    Will is going places, for certain.

    Like

    • The guy’s a genius! I don’t know if I could pick a favorite, but you’ve inspired me to try.
      As for Will, I’m hoping that fart tricks will not be so awe-inspiring as he matures. Ah, who the hell am I kidding? Fart tricks are always awe-inspiring for most of the male population.

      Like

  4. ryoko861 says:

    LMAO!!! OMG, could you imagine!? I want to see a YouTube video first!

    Like

  5. ahh! Love it and that Far Side!

    Like

  6. madtante says:

    Thank you SO much for that old Far Side! He was one of my faves and that one (along with the boy dog courting a female dog) are a couple I still remember!

    “Lost the ability for speech.” Oh!

    Like

  7. Sandi Ormsby says:

    Ohhh, the things we envy. Develop a unqiue talent so you can be invited to parties. The grosser the better. Ha!

    Like

  8. Each person has been given a unique gift in life. This kid’s is that he can clear rooms. He could work riot control.

    Like

  9. I can see being able to fart the ABC’s forwards… but backwards? That’s a little farfetched. 🙂

    Like

  10. Scholar Mel says:

    “who have lost the ability to communicate through speech.”

    Who have also lost the ability to smell 🙂

    Like

  11. John Erickson says:

    You need to show this to Mark over at “The Idiot Speaketh”, since he seems to be having some problems with, shall we say, excess gaseous outputs.
    Why do I have mental images of a person studying an old Morse code manual with a gas mask on? 😀

    Like

  12. I knew the tests we use for identifying gifted students were missing something. I’ll recommend this one to the committee.

    Like

  13. i hope he is as gifted as you are Nancy. continue…

    Like

  14. bearman says:

    He could get a job on Jackass

    Like

    • Jackass! Can you imagine?
      Upon returning home from a quick trip to the grocery store, I discover the inside of my house has been turned into a skate park and there’s a midget, dressed as a clown, preparing to dive off of my roof into a baby pool filled with piranha, while Will and Jay run around the backyard naked wearing cowboy hats and shooting each other with BB guns. Good times!

      Like

  15. Tony McGurk says:

    Ha Ha Ha I’m currently having trouble getting air in my lungs at the moment, GASP!!!. I s’pose this will make farting more socially acceptable. Farting in a restaurant can be excused as asking someone to pass the salt.

    Like

  16. *squeek squeek squeeeeeek*
    -translation-
    Gary Larson = Genius
    🙂

    Like

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