You Should Agree With My Opinion

“Mom, I’m totally coming shopping with you! I’ll help you find something perfect. Trust me, I know what looks good. We’re going to have so much fun!” Anna-12

***

“Ok, Anna. Let’s hear it. What do you think about this one?”

“Nah. I don’t like the color on you. Try something else.”

“How about this?”

“No way! Never in a million years. You look ridiculous!”

“Ok. What about this?”

“It’s hideous. Absolutely horrible. Get it off now. Ick!”

“This one?”

“God, no! It makes you look old and that color makes me nauseous. Yuck! I think I just threw up.”

“Alright. How’s this?”

“What? Are you crazy? You look like you’re trying too hard. Get it off immediately. Hurry up and get back into the dressing room before someone sees you. Run!”

“This one’s cute, right?”

“It’s ok, I guess. But it sorta makes your nose look big. What else do you have in there?”

“How about this?”

“Crappity, crap, crap, crap! It’s too pilgrimish and it doesn’t match your hair. Can’t you see how it draws attention to your roots?”

“This one’s good, I think?”

“Are you kidding me? You look like a monkey wrapped in a table cloth.”

“This?”

“No. No. No. Please, no! You look like a sausage…a rancid, overstuffed sausage.”

“What about this one?”

“Never! It hurts my eyes and makes me wish I was blind. Try something else.”

“Ok. I think this is the one.”

“Mom, that’s so bad and not a little bad…really, really bad. Bad like diarrhea in the middle of a really good movie.”

“Really?”

“Yes, trust me. So, what do you say we wrap this up? We can look for some stuff for me after lunch. This is so much fun! Thanks for inviting me, Mom!”     

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A mother's plight to find the funny in the frustrating and save her sanity.
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54 Responses to You Should Agree With My Opinion

  1. Deb says:

    I’m taking Abby shopping tomorrow. Maybe I should reconsider : )

    Like

  2. Dad says:

    She is creative with analogies. Diarrhea during a good movie is pretty bad so I hope you didn’t get that one. For the record, I like it when it looks like you are trying to hard (wink, wink). Go back and buy that outfit.

    Like

  3. Charlotte B. says:

    lol I used to be like this when I was younger (sometimes, I still am at my 23 years old, when my mom asks me and my sister to help her to find some new clothes…). But, since we never started looking for somehing for me till we were done with her wardrobe, whenever I got tired, I always said something like “you look stunning, you definitely have to buy that!”.

    Like

  4. Goeber.com says:

    At least she is honest. 🙂

    Like

  5. Spectra says:

    SO, what I am getting from this is, Anna has figured out that just getting you in proximity of a mall means new clothes for her? And (tricky little thing) if she discourages you from buying anything, there will be more money for her new wardrobe?

    She will make an excellent wife.

    Like

  6. Thanks for the warning. I will never do this once my daughter’s 12.

    Like

  7. Precisely why I never, ever, ever take my niece shopping.

    Like

  8. I think you can trust her! She’s honest.

    Like

  9. muddledmom says:

    The monkey wrapped in a tablecloth was pretty good, but I seriously hope you got her back. Did you tell her she looked like she was wearing a Muppet when she was trying stuff on?

    Like

  10. cooper says:

    a rancid overstuffed sausage…
    she will write wildly popular fiction some day…

    Like

  11. Tori Nelson says:

    Personally I think Rancid Pilgrimish Sausage Monkey Tablecloth is totally hip 🙂

    Like

  12. ryoko861 says:

    Is this the next Stacy London?

    Like

  13. John Erickson says:

    Funny – it sounds a LOT like the few times I’ve tried to buy stuff for myself, with my wife in tow. (Mind you, she was always right, and not just ’cause we’re married. Hideous doesn’t BEGIN to describe my taste in clothing! 😀 )

    Like

  14. funny. she should lay out your clothes every morning eh. continue…

    Like

  15. These two are my absolute, positive favorites:
    “Never! It hurts my eyes and makes me wish I was blind. Try something else.”
    “Mom, that’s so bad and not a little bad…really, really bad. Bad like diarrhea in the middle of a really good movie.”
    Dimples is usually very helpful when we shop for me, but perhaps that will change when she is 12.

    Like

  16. Binky says:

    Well at least you won’t be spending too much on clothes.

    Like

  17. Lenore Diane says:

    She’s right – diarrhea is bad in the middle of a really good movie. Stick with Anna, Nancy. The girl knows her stuff.

    Like

  18. Bearman says:

    “Bad like diarrhea in the middle of a really good movie.” I am totally stealing that one.

    Like

  19. Carrie says:

    Crappity, crap, crap, crap??

    Oh you can bet this little phrase has now found a new home. Oh, yeah.

    Like

  20. Jackie Cangro says:

    Anna needs to learn the secret of successful shopping with Mom.
    Tell Mom the first thing she tries on is absolutely perfect. She’s never looked more beautiful.
    That gets you out of the dressing room in the “old lady department” fast, so you can move on to the juniors’ section to look for cute stuff for yourself.
    And it puts Mom in a much better mood to spend more money on you. 🙂

    Like

  21. Friggin Loon says:

    Well at least you get some constructive criticism . The response I get is usually a simple “Yeah, no!”

    Like

  22. That’s why I stick to black t-shirts. Almost exclusively.
    Eventually everyone just runs out of things to say.
    🙂

    Like

  23. dragonfae says:

    Ah … the joys of shopping with a teenager! 😆

    Like

  24. Tony McGurk says:

    Ha Ha Ha Love the monkey in a tablecloth one!!!

    Like

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