Asparagus, Rap and the Thousand Paper Cranes

Me:  Jay, please eat your asparagus.

Jay:  But it’s disgusting.

Me:  Just eat it. It’s good for you.Gangsta Jay

Jay:  I think it’s really unfair that everything that’s good for you has to taste so bad.

Me:  It’s just the way it is. Now, eat it. It helps you grow. Don’t you want to grow?

Jay:  Well, just so you know, I’m already taller than the World’s Smallest Man, so you don’t have to worry about that.

Me:  Then I take it you won’t be joining the circus?

Jay:  Nah. I mean, I thought about it, because I hear it’s a pretty good job, but I don’t think I could handle traveling with all those clowns. They freak me out.

Me:  I think that’s a wise decision. Now, please stop talking and start eating.

Jay:  So, I’m thinking that instead, I’ll probably be an author or an artist or maybe even a rapper. I mean, I can’t sing, but that doesn’t matter with rapping. It’s more like talking and I can do that.

Me:  Good idea, but seriously, stop talking and eat. I’m starting to get mad.

Jay:  And here’s another thing…I really think I could be a rapper, because you know how I made up that rap about the book we read in class, Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes? And then how I did the rap in front of the whole class?

Me:  EAT!

Jay:  Why are you yelling at me?

Me:  EAT! YOUR! ASPARAGUS! NOW!

Jay:  Well, everybody said it was good. Even my teacher told me that I write really good rhymes. And everybody knows you shouldn’t be a rapper if you bust out crappy rhymes. So, what do ya think?  Should I be a rapper?

Thousand Paper Cranes

Thousand Paper Cranes 3

Thousand Paper Cranes 2

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A mother's plight to find the funny in the frustrating and save her sanity.
This entry was posted in funny kid quotes, Humor, kids, Parenting and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to Asparagus, Rap and the Thousand Paper Cranes

  1. I’m kind of speechless. Maybe I need to eat some asparagus and fold some paper cranes. Hilarious.

    Like

  2. dad says:

    I don’t know why you fight him on the asparagus…he had like 4 packs of fruit snacks yesterday.

    Like

  3. Asparagus is good, but don’t make him eat Brussel sprouts – ever!

    Like

  4. ryoko861 says:

    Put some melted cheese on the asparagus. That might help. I used to HATE asparagus when I was his age, too. Now I love it. Everything tastes better if it has cheese on it!
    As for the rapping….tell him not to quit his school years just yet.

    Like

  5. Binky says:

    How to eat asparagus: Add cheese. Add more cheese. Add lots more cheese. Remove asparagus. Eat cheese.

    Like

  6. I hear paper cranes taste a bit like asparagus.
    Or was it chicken?
    One of those.

    Like

  7. frigginloon says:

    I love Jay’s niche market ….WWII rap music.

    Like

  8. Lenore Diane says:

    I’ll be singing “Paper cranes, paper cranes…” all weekend. Gee. Thanks Jay. 🙂

    Like

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